I’m at point and position in my life where I need an outlet and purpose for some free time. As a newer mom, my little one is just one year old, you might wonder how I have free time and some days I would agree with you that I don’t. But my introvert tendencies nag at me to take some alone time to recharge in order to be a functioning person. I recently moved with my family away from the place I had called home for the past 10 years leaving friends and a familiar lifestyle. In addition, I have serious mom guilt where it’s sometimes, almost always, difficult to spend time away from my kiddo if it’s for personal reasons. I’m okay going to work but going out with friends or even just taking an hour to go get my hair cut happens infrequently and only when I can’t put it off any longer. This is because I worry people will think that I’m one of those moms that leave their kid all the time.
I know, I shouldn’t worry about what other people think. It’s just that being a mom has been the only thing in my life that I’ve been certain of so it is extremely important to me that I do it well. In addition, it’s a strong personal identifier and I feel I lack those. My current job doesn’t include a clear cut title that I list off when people ask about me. I quilt but I don’t just make quilts so the label is limiting to me. I used to be a runner, I want to be again very badly but it’s one more thing I can’t say that I am without it feeling like a bit of a lie. The reasons and excuses continue with other labels but it remains that since becoming a mom, I feel like it’s my beginning, most of my middle and my end.
So here I am, striving to be more than a mom and most importantly, being okay with it. I’m hoping this blog can help me to do that. Don’t get me wrong, I love my little one and I truly love being a mom. But by sharing my other experiences and talents, I think it will help me to embrace an identity outside ‘mom.’
Thanks for reading! I hope to have another post soon.